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So, per my doctor, I totally could go back to work right now if I chose to, since if I wear my left contact and use drugstore cheaters I can see pretty well — distance is great, up close is deal-with-able. However, per my own needs, I am not going back until the 18th. I’ve got two very particular reasons for that:

1. On Friday, I will be back to not seeing very well, as I can’t wear my left contact while I’m doing the preparatory drops for Monday’s surgery, and then it’s probably Wednesday again before I stop feeling like post-operative poop. I was surprised by how hard the anesthesia punched me, in terms of after-effects.

2. I need a fucking break, and I’m taking one.

I mean, yes, I just had a week’s vacation in Australia, but I also worked my ass off the week before that for the NLS6 folks, and I worked equally hard to tie up my loose ends before I left. And it was a wonderful, rejuvenating experience, but it wasn’t restful.

So far today I stayed up late reading a book, and then slept from 2 am to noon. I made myself some lunch. I read a book. I pet my cats. I took a catnap with my cats. I made a list of things I hope to accomplish while I’m home. I put drops in my eyes, took my vitamins, and weighed myself. I did a Google hangout with my friend David so he could test a microphone for one of his colleagues (and we chatted about The Dresden Files). I caught up with a few friends online, offering sympathy, advice, and support. I read a bunch of blogs and news articles about a bunch of stuff that wasn’t library-related.

That’s about it. Now I’m gonna go unpack the medicine cabinet into the new bathroom cupboards, and look for my makeup in the still-not-unpacked-yet tubs of stuff that was in the old bathrooms. Then I’ll eat dinner, and probably watch some Mystery! of some sort on one of our streaming services.

And I’m okay with that.  It’s not “productive”. But it’s good for me. I need a break. I need some time to collect the pieces of my energy and sew them back together. I need to acknowledge that doing that has value equal to the value of going to work and doing ACRL statistics and scheduling meetings with Advancement folks and debating strategic directions with my coworkers.

It’s okay to need a break.

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